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Redneck Medical Terms

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Rednecks seem to have a slightly different view of medical term definitions than the rest of us, lets have a look at a few...

Artery = The study of painting

Bacteria = The back door of the cafeteria

Barium = What doctors do when the patients die

Caesarean Section = A neighborhood in Rome

Cat Scan = Looking for Socks

Cauterize = Made eye contact with her

Dilate = Live long

Hangnail = Coathook

Impotent = Distingquished and well known

Labor Pain = Getting hurt at work

Morbid = A higher offer

Nitrates = Cheaper than day rates

Node = Was aware of

Papsmear = A paternity test

Pelvis = A cousin to Elvis

Postoperative = Mail carrier

Recovery Room = A place to do upholstery

Seizure = A Roman emperor

Terminal Illness = Getting sick at the airport

Tumor = An additional pair

Urine = Opposite of you're out

Varicose = Nearby

Vein =Conceited